[RL with Harvey - I Feel Your Pain, Bro]

[tntandgasoline]

The Joker was sick and tired of getting fire thrown at him. This was the second time in as many weeks that he'd been harassed by that little fire-bending bitch.

After crawling back home from his secret lair - that is to say, in his abandoned meat factory - the Joker was kind of incapacitated at the moment. His forearms were definitely going to be burnt and his face probably had an unhealthy tan to it, but the worst thing was the patch of hair missing at the side of his head and his missing eyebrows.

He was a vain man, after all.

"Harvey," he called, in his best and most put-upon tone, "I need help!"

Comments

[thedawniscoming.livejournal.com]

Harvey recognized that tone, just as he recognized the sudden look of disturbed fear flashing across his lackey's face. Everyone knew that voice and everyone with half (haha) a brain knew to fear it. Harvey placed the blueprint across the table, lifting his head to tilt his good ear towards the noise.

"Leave." He said, turning and heading towards the noise as the man scrambled off. He stopped in the doorway, arms crossed against his chest as he regarded the sorry sight.

"I could make a few comments about 'playing with fire.'" He commented dryly as his split brow rose. "What happened this time?"

[tntandgasoline]

"Don't patronize me, Harvey, you half-baked bastard." The Joker was pouting, fuming really, talking through gritted teeth. "Azula happened this time. She needs a cold shower."

He gestured with his head, "Go get me some burn cream or something. Goddamn that bitch!"

[thedawniscoming.livejournal.com]

"Do I look like your nurse?" Harvey asked, tone faintly amused by the whole affair even with the undertone of irritation. "So it was Azula, the question is what you did this time to piss her off?" He paused, tone growing more irate. "Did you bring her here?"

[tntandgasoline]

He rolled his eyes exaggeratedly, "Well, I don't see Crane around any more and I certainly don't think Tommy's got a good bedside manner." He glared back at the half-fried DA. "I'm the victim, here!"

[thedawniscoming.livejournal.com]

"That doesn't answer my question." Harvey said, walking over regardless to survey the damage more closely. After a moment he crossed his arms. "You'll live."

[tntandgasoline]

"Of course I'll live," he sneered. "She's a coward, she won't bother killing me. And all I did was make fun of her. She's so sensitive!"

[thedawniscoming.livejournal.com]

"What is she, fifteen?" Harvey rolled his eyes. The effect always came off a little googly eyed. "You better not bring her here again if you did." He said, finally turning to get something for the burns.

[tntandgasoline]

"Sixteen." The Joker tried to shift and yelped at the pain. Damn that little - "I didn't bring her anywhere. She showed up while I was at the factory. How was I supposed to stop her?"

[thedawniscoming.livejournal.com]

"You shouldn't have gone and drawn her here in the first place." Harvey called, coming back with burn ointment and an annoyed expression. "Isn't Gotham enough of a playground for you?"

[tntandgasoline]

"It is! I just got bored! God, Harvey, as though you've never had people over here that shouldn't have been." He pouted up at Harvey. "Cut me some slack, I'm compulsive."

[thedawniscoming.livejournal.com]

He couldn't exactly argue that, so instead he opened the jar. "Keep your mouth shut for once." Harvey said, none to gently salving some of the contents onto the Joker's forehead. "Pay her a visit next time, the last thing we need is Gotham burning again because of some brat with a temper."

[tntandgasoline]

The Joker grumbled but didn't actually say anything, so that was a step up. When asked a question, though, of course he was going to answer, wincing against the feeling of cold cream on his skin. "Ugh. I don't care about her. She isn't the one I'd go to."